How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
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When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
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When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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