Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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