I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
So squirting runs in the family.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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