But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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