I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
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