sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I currently don't understand fingers.
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