Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize