Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
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