Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-