Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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