barbara walters just said penis...
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
cat food counts as protein by the way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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