Sober January is a disaster.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
