I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
