it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
My bed smells like the plague
Randomize