Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
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ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
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pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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