May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
