yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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