You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
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