so let's talk penis.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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