i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Randomize
