I've blown a few things in my day
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
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