Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
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