The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize
