So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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