tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead