i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
