is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize