I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Randomize
