Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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