Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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