never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I got inside last night via doggy door
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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