Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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