She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
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