Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex