i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
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