my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
