Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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