i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize