dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Randomize