Bea Arthur died! :(
Big bird passed.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination