I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize