The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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