She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
