well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize