Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
