Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Randomize
