help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
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I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
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