can u get pink eye on your cock?
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize