This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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