Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
