Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker